The empty promises of feminism

The empty promises of feminism  –   /https://thinktanklatam.org/la-familia-y-el-auge-de-occidente/

Prof. David Thunder and Olivia Serrano, 1.6.2024 – Translation of the original article in English.

The great paradox of the “liberated” woman of our era is that, in freeing herself from traditional roles and expectations, she may also lose her orientation and meaning in life. A life that seems “liberated” from oppressive obligations and bondage can become empty and aimless. Gilmore Girls ( https://es.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gilmore_Girls) offers valuable insight into the dilemma of the modern woman, who feels forced to choose between optimizing her career and finding fulfillment in family life.

Gilmore Girls chronicles the daily lives of Lorelai Gilmore, a single mother who became pregnant at sixteen, and her daughter Rory. The series begins when Rory is sixteen, allowing viewers to watch her grow and manifest herself throughout the seven-year run of the television series, with her ever-loyal mother by her side.

Rory graduates from Yale University with a degree in journalism to embark on an exciting but uncertain journey. At 22, she turns down a marriage proposal. Ten years later, at 32, Rory owns no property, has no place she can truly call home, is not married and is not excited about her professional life. She leads a nomadic lifestyle, recycling past romances without committing to anyone.

This is the life of a woman who bought into the promises of feminism, like millions of others, believing that professional success should always come first and that she could find a partner and start a family later, in due time. Rory turned down her boyfriend’s marriage proposal at age 22, not because she didn’t love him or because he was a bad match for her, but because they were “too young” and had to build their careers first.

His decision to postpone marriage seemed sensible and logical to her. However, ten years later, she feels lonely and purposeless, becoming the unmarried “mistress” of the very man who once wanted to marry her. So much for making a career first and then “settling down.”

Rory’s feminist dream has consequences for the men in her life. Logan, who had once wanted to marry Rory and start a family, finds himself wandering through life without a purpose after his marriage proposal had been rejected. Ten years later, he is “engaged” to another woman, but spends his nights and free time with his college sweetheart, becoming a man who prefers to avoid real commitments.

Ironically, the series concludes with Rory revealing to his mother that she is pregnant. This twist underscores the fact that, despite attempts to avoid and defer the commitments of marriage and motherhood, this young woman eventually finds a channel for her maternal instincts, albeit outside of any stable relationship.

Gilmore Girls is a moving portrait of a young woman who bought into feminism’s empty promise that she could “have it all” and pursue her career ambitions at full throttle without harming the prospects of having a family or being a mother. In Rory Gilmore, I see the regretful look of many friends and colleagues who secretly wish they had made different choices.

Of course, there is nothing wrong with pursuing a career with passion and devotion. But that passion, if too single-minded, can cloud our vision. Some important life-changing decisions, such as becoming a mother, are urgent. Sometimes, by the time you realize how badly you want it, it’s too late.

Ultimately, the sadness in Rory’s eyes confirms that love and commitment to something noble and inspiring is what truly makes us free and happy. Avoiding commitment to preserve freedom is counterproductive, for freedom divorced from commitment is like a ship adrift without a navigation system.

Using freedom solely for personal gain or career advancement, divorced from any solid notion of commitment, community and love is a shallow existence, no matter how much feminism may claim otherwise. A life without lasting love or commitment, such as that of young people who participate in the superficial “hookup” or “one-night stand” culture of many college campuses, may offer some emotional excitement, but at its core it is unfulfilling and empty.

True freedom is not found in the absence of commitment, but in the richness of the relationships we choose and the love we cultivate. We cannot taste the fruits of freedom until we take responsibility for our own lives and commit ourselves to something beautiful, that takes us beyond ourselves and our egos. Freedom is not diminished by commitment, but amplified by the depth and meaning that commitments bring to our lives.

Our comments

Alongside the millions of women whose lives have been shattered by feminist ideology, it is good to look at the many millions of happy women’s lives, even if marriage and motherhood have cost them sacrifices. It is they, together with their husbands, who carry the world forward, being a promise pregnant with life, who have the virtue of reproducing themselves in the face of a future that, in spite of everything, will be fortunate.  https://thinktanklatam.org/el-privilegio-de-los-hijos-de-familia/